In case you haven't caught on, the Valley is a beautiful culmination of the United States and Mexico; both nations collide and form what we call a border town. Border Towns have their own rules and the community is united under commonality.

I understand the Valley is different and it has its quirks and to outsiders, these quirks can come across as inconvenient and frustrating, at times. However, my attempt is not to persuade you to accept the Valley or Border Towns, but to help you understand the culture. I want to begin with one central message: dialects.

While it sounds like something made up, I can assure you, "Tex-Mex" is a legitimate dialect. Below are brief examples of dialects that many have a misunderstanding of and here is my attempt to help bring it all together.

CHICANO ENGLISH

It's not uncommon to travel to southern California and hear Mexican-Americans (or people of Mexican heritage) refer to themselves as Chicanos. Similar to the Valley, California's border towns provide a unique sense of culture and language. While we have a lot in common, the choice of words for certain things are different.

Tacos are burritos while in Texas a burrito is fried or an enormous tortilla filled with meat, rice, beans, and cheese; a taco is a soft tortilla wrapped in a delicious delicacy. Additionally, in SoCal, fajitas is carne asada, but in Texas carne asada refers to meat that is grilled over fire; fajitas is a type of meat.

My wife is from California and we have this argument often.

In any case, California and Texas share common interests, but it's simply communicated differently- this includes slang.

POCHO

"Pocho" refers to broken Spanish. It's taking words from the English language and making them sound Spanish. It can be hilarious. It can be insulting. But at the end of the day, if you walk into a barrio and do not speak Pocho, but formal Spanish, you might as well be a rich white boy from Harvard- you're not welcomed.

Words in Pocho include "lonche" which means "lunch," "chorts" which mean "shorts (yes, the kind you wear," or "tochar" meaning "to touch." Get it? Pocho.

I could give this large sociological excerpt on Pocho, but this is a blog, not a journal.

SPANGLISH

This is a serious debate for many because often it can be confused for Tex-Mex or Chicano English, but quite frankly, it isn't.

Spanglish is its own dialect and it refers to the unity of two languages in order to paint one picture. In short, starting a sentence in English is the beginning of a thought and what brings color and life to that thought, idea, or conversation is finishing it in proper Spanish.

"The people needed to be led; they needed orgullo, animo."

TEX-MEX

Tex-Mex is very similar to Pocho, much like many forms of Chicano English. In fact, the separation in both dialects is geographical location. If Pocho is broken Spanish, then Tex-Mex is broken Spanglish.

For example:

"I'm going to the store." | "Voy a ir a la tienda." | "Voy 'pa la store."

"Why?" | "¿Porque?" | "Por why?"

"Stop." | "Alto." | "Estop."

Additionally, whistling is a form of communication. How one whistles will determine their feelings or thoughts. If one whistles before finishing their sentence, it is because the whistle conveys the remainder of the thought or feeling. Whistling is also used to grab one's attention (No you're not a dog, get over yourself. If you think that, then you take yourself way to seriously).

CONCLUSION

I wish to end by saying that this brief introduction into border language is an attempt to help you (or make you laugh) understand border culture. Please, do not be offended when you step on border soil and the majority population doesn't speak English, it's an insult when you speak louder or display irritation.

Remember, this is a country of immigrants with a ridiculous amount of cultures, dialects, and beliefs. And, no where in the constitution or declaration does it state that English is the official language of the United States. It's the most common, estuped.

The holiday passed. We know. And we're sorry. But this post wouldn't be very Valley if it was on time, though we're on board to change that. Eventually.

If you haven't realized, the Valley is a cultured area where holidays such as Mother's Day are taken very seriously and are celebrated grandiosely.

Every restaurant is packed and all the grocery stores have run out of charcoal and lighter fluid.

But that's not the challenge. The challenge is knowing when to celebrate Mother's Day or Dia de la Madres.

Living in a border town can often be pretty confusing. The majority of our families are of Mexican-descent so it would only be natural to celebrate Dia de las Madres on the 10th, which is the celebration date in Mexico.

But there's this unspoken tension about technically living in the United States so celebrating Mother's Day should be left for celebrating on May 11th.

I see 3 options:

Celebrate both days because you can't go wrong in making much of your mom for a full weekend.
Choose to celebrate on the 10th or the 11th, but make a big deal in leading up to whichever day you decide; a surprise.
Stop being a menso in using the 11th as an excuse to buy your mom something because you completely forgot that it was Dia de las Madres and you're "saved by the date."

I know you're still living at home with your mom anyway. You might as well make the weekend all about her and do her laundry for a change.